Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
