mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
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