he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Randomize