I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Less talking, more tequila
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize