I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Randomize
