I love black thongs
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
