is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize