"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
