Texts From Last Night

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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  We named our party play list daddy issues

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  (704): We named our party play list daddy issues http://tfl.nu/zy7m
  Replies (4) Good night (2658) Bad night (660)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?

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  (407): i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub? http://tfl.nu/tcak
  Replies (33) Good night (8214) Bad night (734)
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  (905): View more from Toronto

  when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college

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  (905): when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college http://tfl.nu/ke7d
  Replies (43) Good night (1314) Bad night (6295)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?

  (314): View more from Missouri

  you had an obligation.

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  (913): So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right? (314): you had an obligation. http://tfl.nu/0hhp
  Replies (20) Good night (8029) Bad night (733)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.

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  (702): I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared. http://tfl.nu/11u7
  Replies (4) Good night (3012) Bad night (1433)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both

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  (919): I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both http://tfl.nu/fi30
  Replies (13) Good night (4267) Bad night (892)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.

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  (847): I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet. http://tfl.nu/wpea
  Replies (2) Good night (2045) Bad night (1528)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.

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  (330): White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux. http://tfl.nu/a54h
  Replies (5) Good night (1891) Bad night (632)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying

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  (330): I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying http://tfl.nu/l6qe
  Replies (6) Good night (374) Bad night (713)
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  (563): View more from Iowa

  I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.

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  (563): I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took. http://tfl.nu/2cez
  Replies (7) Good night (1223) Bad night (418)
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  (940): View more from Texas

  Sorry about the flaming shit on your door

  (940): View more from Texas

  I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text

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  (940): Sorry about the flaming shit on your door (940): I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text http://tfl.nu/x4xg
  Replies (3) Good night (711) Bad night (477)
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  (334): View more from Alabama

  I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.

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  (334): I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system. http://tfl.nu/d0ap
  Replies (1) Good night (585) Bad night (276)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  Why are you there anyways?

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist

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  (313): Why are you there anyways? (248): Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist http://tfl.nu/9tvc
  Replies (4) Good night (843) Bad night (352)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did

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  (205): There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did http://tfl.nu/00cd
  Replies (2) Good night (340) Bad night (905)
• Favorite

  (607): View more from New York

  Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.

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  (607): Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme. http://tfl.nu/vszb
  Replies (3) Good night (658) Bad night (238)

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