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• (818): View more from California

  So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?

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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.

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• (845): View more from New York

  No more Irish car bombs ever.

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.

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  19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (954): View more from Florida

  Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.

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• (520): View more from Arizona

  He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.

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• (210): View more from Texas

  Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.

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• (989): View more from Michigan

  I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.

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  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (613): View more from Ontario

  I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?

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• (413): View more from Massachusetts

  Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.

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• (636): View more from Missouri

  Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.

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• (504): View more from Louisiana

  Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.

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• (406): View more from Montana

  Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea

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