It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
