help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
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He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
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Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Oh and itโs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ๐๐๐๐ฌ๐ณ๐
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