angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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