your room smells of hookers.
And success
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
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