Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
