God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
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I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
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Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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