I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize
