you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
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