we have officially lost it.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
