so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Randomize
