Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
