I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize
