Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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