her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
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