This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
