Texts From Last Night

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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.

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  (918): I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater. http://tfl.nu/r4ec
  Replies (9) Good night (4620) Bad night (805)
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  (870): View more from Arkansas

  I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.

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  (870): I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership. http://tfl.nu/f8ej
  Replies (50) Good night (6760) Bad night (1537)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue

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  (812): Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue http://tfl.nu/ir9h
  Replies (93) Good night (4781) Bad night (1246)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal

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  (406): i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal http://tfl.nu/k627
  Replies (36) Good night (5723) Bad night (845)
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.

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  (517): you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs. http://tfl.nu/b4sz
  Replies (13) Good night (4818) Bad night (1336)
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  (818): View more from California

  I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.

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  (818): I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them. http://tfl.nu/l7o1
  Replies (20) Good night (1384) Bad night (6292)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.

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  (336): Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other. http://tfl.nu/ei4k
  Replies (5) Good night (1067) Bad night (3051)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.

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  (207): I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off. http://tfl.nu/j6re
  Replies (14) Good night (1175) Bad night (3214)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake

  (1-561): View more from Florida

  Who the fuck is this

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  (561): Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake (1-561): Who the fuck is this http://tfl.nu/nqou
  Replies (13) Good night (4870) Bad night (997)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!

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  (+44): Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?! http://tfl.nu/zew5
  Replies (1) Good night (811) Bad night (1121)
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  (916): View more from California

  I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?

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  (916): I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die? http://tfl.nu/yj8c
  Replies (11) Good night (1505) Bad night (533)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.

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  (561): I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover. http://tfl.nu/c2xb
  Replies (11) Good night (422) Bad night (1223)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..

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  (843): It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone.. http://tfl.nu/vld6
  Replies (13) Good night (490) Bad night (1559)
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  (620): View more from Kansas

  It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?

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  (620): It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more? http://tfl.nu/0gbc
  Replies (1) Good night (929) Bad night (443)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.

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  (773): You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather. http://tfl.nu/u56m
  Replies (1) Good night (199) Bad night (280)

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