i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Randomize
