Apparently you make a good broom.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework