batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
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