3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Randomize
