not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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