I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
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