I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
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