I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
