I look better un-naked...
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Randomize