I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Randomize
