the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
