At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize