Yo dont text me then not text me
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Randomize
