Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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