You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize