Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
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