it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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