Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
