I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Randomize
