just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
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