haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
