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hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
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