Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize