Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize