I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
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