Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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