Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
