He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
If its not for food we ain't going out.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
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