ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
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